Al.Qaeda.net

January 2005 CE

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January 2005 CE
Journal Entry
January 29th
6005 AL
What if I am just a small section of an end track of a
massive digestive system. What if that was all I
am... What if every thing I experience is imaginary I
am just Gods "A$$ hole". God in that case being an
eating breathing organic creature, and all humanity
being cells that make up a single being. Just a
thought I had once somewhere between a dream, a
nightmare, and a vision.
I guess I would just continue to exist as I was
programmed to exist.
My entire life can be summed up to an incredibly
sharp Cutco knife that has "Remember" engraved
into it and an idea that if their are Gods they are
Children to the universe. That no objective is out or
reach and no idea is impossible.
Journal Entry
January 26th
6005 AL
Today in Gary Indiana I saw Graffiti that said
"Jesus Saves". I don't know what to make of it.
Journal Entry
January 24th
6005 AL
In my unconscious state I stumbled threw dreams I
had forgotten I had. Dreams of lost love that ended
bittersweet. Dreams of betrayal, dreams of love and
lies. Times that I played the fool and ended up alone
and broken. There in the field alone, when you
promised to meet me... There where I stood all
alone waiting and you never came. Your absence
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hurt the worst but that pain was bittersweet. As if
the pain is all I was able to truly feel. I have never
been more then a phone call away. You never
called, at least not to say hi. In my dream you were
wading in a pool with your family. You looked into
my hurt eyes and said, "I can't handle you in large
amounts, that is why I didn't show up". I excepted
that. Some things are better as dreams, as memories,
in this bittersweet reality.
All of this a stone throw away from the fortress my
friends and I had built in forest for hell of it, for
shelter, and for protection.
All of this and the static buzzes and sparkles in the
background like demons that are angels under dark
orders with no choice but to listen. I have my
orders, you have your orders, those above you have
their orders, those in charge have their orders
handed down from the collective. The collective has
its orders, handed down from genetic code and
environmental factors, all of that is controlled by
past environmental factors that built the code that
now controls the worlds evolution into
machinehood.
You are my greener pastures, beside the weeping
willows in the valley of existence, in the spring time
of my life... All-ways love, and in the background
static and fear.
The universe dances around us to tribal beat as we
are herald threw oblivion toured our impending
doom. As if any of it matters. So let us live by fairy
tales where every life has meaning, we all have the
ability to be immortal, We all reach enlightenment,
and eventually we will all find peace within
ourselves and within our place in the universe.